Pain and anguish buried deep in the shadows
by Purple-Pebbles
Summary: Well Rory is kinda dating Logan but is in Love w/ one of his best friends. She is hurting over the fact that she can't have him when one day while sitting in a pub someone from her past brings her back the happiness she craves.One-shot


**A/N : Okay so this is a one-shot and I really don't think I will continue it even if people asked me too, it as just an idea I had in my head. Now grammar and spelling .. I know I have them so don't bother pointing them out I just couldn't be bothered to correct and correct and correct. If someone has a problem with it feel free to contact me and tell me that you would like to correct it and I will change this one fore the corrected one and give you full credit.**

**About the story ... well it's a bit cryptic maybe and a tad bit confusing, it even confused me a bit at the way things turned out, but I kinda liked it so i left it the way it was. It ended short and sweet with no complications and that is how it is going to stay. Anyways, I just hope you enjoy it :)**

**Rating : T because there really isn't anything that should be hid from anyone underage but I just wanted to make sure it's not rated to low.**

**Disclaimer : I own the idea. That's it point blank. The rest belong to who even wrote the script and hade the idea of Gilmore Girls.**

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><p><strong>Pain and anguish buried in the shadows<strong>

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><p>I watched him flirt with yet another redhead while Logan had one arm wrapped around my shoulder talking to Collin about the next Life and Death brigade event I could care less about. It pained me that he did not noticing how I tensed or the way I tried to move away from him, I knew I didn't love him but I cared for him and it hurt that I seemed to only be the accessory on his arms to show off. All that regret and disappointment did not compare to the way my eyes burned and my heart clenched as he leaned in to her and whispered something that made her laugh and touch his chest. I hated the burning and blazing envy that was threatening to surface from the depths of my being, by the way my fists balled into white flaming balls of fire. I hated the way I couldn't breath and hated the way my bones hurt, hated the way his laugh made me tingle, I plain and simple hated him.<p>

I closed my eyes and tried to gather myself together as they both approached us. I didn't hear him introducing her, did not notice the automatic fake smile that took over my face that looked so genuine, I felt sick, so sick infect that I wanted noting more then to bolt, but I stayed because the way his hands and legs brushed against mine made me feel at ease, made my skin burn and plead for more. I swallowed the lump that had formed when she looked at him through her thick, fake lashes. Just a few more hours and I could go home.

I wasn't paying attention to anyone and no one was paying attention to me, so I just let my thoughts drift while I looked at the half empty glass of long island iced-tea in my hands. I don't remember when it all started, don't remember the first time my heart skipped a beat just looking at him, don't remember the first time I wished for his sent to cover mine but I do remember the first time I broke down crying because of him. It was four months ago and it was just another party and just like at any other party I was sitting in a room reading my book and avoiding Logan for as long as I could. The door had burst open and I had seen _him_ stumble in through the unlocked door, lips attached to some cheap red head, shirt half unbuttoned and his fly already undone. He noticed my presence and smiled sheepishly at me, rubbing his neck and apologizing. I had just nodded and shrugged not noticing the way my hands trembled, thank god neither had he. Once the door was closed behind them the book fell from my hands and they circled my chest, I felt as if I was tearing apart. That was the day I realized I hated him, it was also the day I realized I loved him.

Remembering that day is painful even now with three empty glasses on the table, no one seemed to notice this and it had me cringe and gasp, but not loudly enough to grab the other's attention. I wanted to leave and just crawl into my bed with the covers over my head, trying to find a semblance of protection from the world that just held pain for me in the past months. Before I could excuse myself for the night by giving them some lame excuse about not feeling well, I heard a voice that I had not heard in years, the only voice other then _his_ that had me week in the knees, the only voice that ever held me as hypnotized as _his_.

"I would have never thought I would see the day I would see Mary in a pub, guess the army did not prepare me for this." Without having to look back I knew it was him, the bane of my existence in High School, the boy that had me afraid of my feelings because of the intensity of them.

"I am surprised the army could get anything into that thick head of yours bible boy." It was then that I turned around and looked at him for the first time in years. He had changed so much but not at all. His hear was shorter then it had been, indicating that he hadn't left the Military too long ago, his face had lost some of the boyish roundness he had and had taken the shape of a man, his body had already resembled that of a god before he left but now, now he looked like a living sin, like the devil himself, but the thing that caught my attention were his eyes, his beautiful Cristal blue eyes that had me mesmerized every time I looked at them, they had been haunted the last time I got lost in them but now they seemed guarded but alive and free, so exhilarating that I couldn't help but bite my lip.

"Mary, Mary haven't you learned yet? No one can tame me and you wouldn't have me any different" that had me chuckling and shacking my head, he was right, I wouldn't want him any other way. I stood up and threw my arms around his neck while he twirled me around while his arms on my waist burned a path to my heart. The pain was still there but it dulled, it made me forget about him for a while and just enjoy my bible boy's arms around me.

"Tristan how many times do I have to tell you that your ego is way too big? You need to cool it? I wouldn't want you not to be able to pass through the door now would I?" I mocked him while smiling brightly, and for the first time in months it reached my eyes, I was sure of it. He smirked at me and bend down to whisper.

"I would tear down any wall that came between you and me Mary," and just like that I melted as my heart pounded painfully in my chest. I felt guilt I shouldn't have felt because it wasn't for Logan, it was for _him, _I heard my mind whisper for me to move on and to let it go, to not feel that pain anymore but my heart thudded at the thought of forgetting him.

"You'll never change Bible boy and I don't want you too." I hugged him again and settled my head in his neck breathing in his sent I could never truly forget, our moment was disturbed however when Logan's voice finally got through the barriers of our bubble.

"Ace would you like to introduce us?" No, I thought but I knew that dragging him away form Logan wouldn't help any, he would continue on persisting till I finally gave in. It was then I was happy that Logan and I were not dating exclusively. Tristan kept one arm around my shoulder as I turned around and started introducing them.

"Well Tristan, this is Logan, the one that looks like he has a stick up his ass is Collin, the blond besides him is Stephanie, the one next to the red head is Finn and well the red head next to him is .." I blenched and cringed for getting caught not paying attention before when she was being introduced to us. I saw her huff and cross her arms indignantly, while eying Tristan like a piece of meat and it had my blood boiling. She had no right to look at him like that, she already had _him. _

"I'm Cassy" she informed Tristan giving him a once over that had him hold me closer to him while whisper,

"can she be any more obvious?" I chuckled and shrugged

"you know how these girls can be, I am sure you had your fair share of them." I saw him cringe and shudder making me roll my eyes at his theatrics. "Anyways guys this is Tristan a former class mate of mine, we used to go to Chilton together and he was also the bane of my existence" the others nodded in greeting but Logan was just glaring at him calculatingly and Finn just looked away body tens, what was that all about?

"Now, now Mary, bane of your existence is a bit harsh," I looked up at him too see that his eyes were twinkling and shining with humor and mischief.

"Harsh? You wouldn't leave me alone! That and the sexual comments you kept throwing my way knowing well that i would be uncomfortable, you gave me problems with Dean and you could never get my name straight!" I exclaimed but inside I was feeling all soft and warm, somehow I knew that all would be good in time.

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><p><strong>So? I know this is the part were I ask you to review nicely, but I won't because people will do what they like anyway .. if you feel like it I will greatly appreciate your comment. Anyways that's it :)<strong>


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